She started talking to me about a new offering that I needed to put out in the world. My body shut down instantly. My head started to spin. This was not a conversation I needed to be having right now.

I was in the midst of packing and moving (the coastal hinterland was calling me), selling all my belongings (coz the idea of holding them in storage felt heavy), finding a new school for my daughter, finding a tenant for my old apartment (I broke lease), renegotiating the parenting plan with my ex-husband, coaching clients, teaching a weekly workshop, travelling, organising an event, collaborating on projects…and so on and so on.

I was feeling maxed out in every way possible.

I called it “burn out”.
She called it “responsibility fatigue”.

And in that moment, my whole body relaxed, just as it does when a deeper truth has been spoken.

Responsibility fatigue comes before burn out. It’s the red flag you need to pay attention to so you can course correct back to wholeness and vitality.

If you are suffering from responsibility fatigue, here are 4 things you need to do immediately:

1. Stay in your own business. 

“If you are living your life and I am mentally living your life, who is here living mine? We’re both over there. Being mentally in your business keeps me from being present in my own. I am separate from myself, wondering why my life doesn’t work.To think that I know what’s best for anyone else is to be out of my business. Even in the name of love, it is pure arrogance, and the result is tension, anxiety, and fear. Do I know what’s right for me? That is my only business.” ~ Byron Katie

This one is an ongoing practice, and at times a challenging practice. But it’s also the most liberating practice.

Sometimes you’ll be able to return to your own business swiftly, and easily. Other times, you’ll need a friend or a great coach to firmly remind you that the worries or concerns you speak of, are none of you’re business. They are somebody’s else’s business or they are God’s business.

So get very clear on where your responsibility begins and where you’re responsibility ends. For everything outside those parameters, drop it. Drop it like it’s HOT!

2. Put your self-care needs first. 

Some of the women I work with in my coaching practice have a really difficult time owning their needs, let alone expressing those needs to others. (If you’re a type 2 on the Ennegram, you’ll most likely relate). There’s a voice inside their head telling them that the needs of everyone else are more important than their own.

Fellow mama’s and entrepreneurs, I know you’re guilty of this one too! That’s why you’ve ended at the bottom of the list again.

It’s time to reorder your priorities so you are number one. And you need to do this yesterday. Remember, if you’re running on empty you’ve got nothing to give.

Ask yourself:

What do you need so your body and soul feel nourished and vitalised?
What do you need to experience the feeling of being taken care of?
What do you need to give yourself today that your future self will thank you for tomorrow (or next month or next year)?

If you’re looking for some great ways to nurture yourself, check out this post on How to Start your Day.

3. Simplify your life. 

Downsize.
Declutter.
Delegate.

Anything that feels heavy or icky or tight needs to go. Be ruthless. You’re ultimate goal is to feel light: physically, mentally and emotionally. Say no more.

4. Dance.  

When was the last time you lost yourself on the dance floor and overdosed on some wild fun times?! Whenever it was, I can tell you now it’s been waaaaay too long. All those responsibilities have you taking life to seriously. It’s time to lighten up. Crank up your favourite tunes and dance it all out. Better yet, get your booty to my upcoming Sacred Dance Party, LOVE SEX DESIRE IGNITED and I’ll take care of the rest.